A Visit to the Ear Doctor

As luck would have it, one morning I woke up with a blocked ear. I wouldn't say the blockage came as a surprise exactly, only that unlike other times, on this occasion it stubbornly refused to unblock. I tugged at the earlobe, pulled, pressed, pinched my nose and tried to blow - "to make it pop" - nothing. On top of all that, the added stress of having caught the flu as a child, which left me with worse hearing in the other ear (the one that hadn't blocked).

The first thought that came to mind was to go to the family doctor, for two reasons: 1. in case it was not actually a wax plug after all, and 2. such a simple procedure as ear irrigation the family doctor or one of the nurses could surely perform without a referral to an ENT specialist. But here there was a small problem - I would need to call the family doctor, only how, if one ear was blocked and with the other it was hard to hear (and process) speech. I decided to go to the office, figuring it would unblock on its own along the way. It did not.

I plugged earphones into my smartphone and called the doctor. To my surprise I discovered that the ringtone sounded quite loud indeed, giving hope that the voice on the other end would also be audible. She outlined the options: there was apparently some ear oil available from pharmacies, or else I would have to go to an ENT specialist, as neither the doctor herself nor the nurses perform such a procedure. Since I know the doctor outside of a medical context too, managing to arrange a time was comparatively straightforward. Off I went.

With a special instrument she examined the ear and concluded - it was a wax plug. I would need to go to an ENT specialist. She wrote a referral and... - "Ah, where should I go?" - "Well, you can go to the same polyclinic, or try the 1st Hospital, or somewhere else where the queues are shorter." Oh! Queues! The same polyclinic apparently had queues of around two weeks, but it could be arranged for a fee. Well, for a fee then, so be it. I was not in the mood to call around looking for which doctor had more availability. I went to the reception, explained the situation - and the lady behind the reception desk snapped back that the nearest appointment was the following Monday. Well, that is of course more promising, but still the prospect of living five days in "outer space" was not quite the one I had imagined. And for a fee? - Oh, for a fee, even right now, the receptionist blossomed into a smile. - How much? - 27 EUR. Hmm.... well, alright.

It should be noted here that the reception is on the first floor, but the ENT is on the sixth :)

I stepped into the ENT doctor's office. Two ladies at the desk. The older and more serious-looking one was presumably the doctor; the other one with the fancy hairdo was presumably the nurse. They were looking at a computer, having what looked like a rather leisurely conversation. When I placed on the desk the referral - bearing one short sentence: wax plug in the left ear - and the paid receipt, both turned their attention to me with interest. The doctor examined the ear and reached the same conclusion - a wax plug. It needed to be irrigated. The only problem being that the polyclinic had no water. - What?! - "Come back later or another day." Now hold on - I had just forked out 27 EUR with one goal - to receive the service right now! Without comment, the nurse stood up, went into the adjacent room, then cheerfully announced: there is water after all! She took an electric kettle, which, as one might deduce, had moments earlier been used to heat water for tea or coffee, and heated the water for ear irrigation.

The procedure was as procedures go. The nurse took warm water and an enormous, bottle-sized syringe, pulled the ear, inserted it and poured. A bowl under the ear to collect the water. One ear, then the other. The procedure is not painful, but one couldn't call it pleasant either. The result is felt immediately. Afterwards the doctor, using an even more formidable instrument than the family doctor's - worn around the head - carefully examined the ear and solemnly announced: all in order. But... there would be an additional charge of 8 EUR for the procedure. What?!

Conclusions

1. Not all patients can reach their family doctors outside of working hours. I very much hope one can at least reach the family practice, i.e. a nurse, who would most likely schedule an appointment at the earliest possible time - early in the morning, in the so-called "acute hour".

2. For a procedure which in my view could be performed by a nurse without a doctor, and moreover under any circumstances: 1.42 EUR + 27 EUR + 8 EUR = 36.42 EUR. Of course, one could have waited a couple of days - it would have been cheaper - or rushed to call every known and unknown ear doctor in the hope of finding one who had not exhausted their state-funded quotas.

3. A visit to the doctor takes an unpredictable amount of time. During the "acute hour" there is a live queue, meaning you may get through quickly or you may not. Generally, in all my experience of going to doctors, a queue is a rather relative concept.

4. Hindsight is a wonderful thing. I later learned that some polyclinic on Dunte Street performs such a procedure for 15 EUR. It should be added that on the official website there is no mention of this whatsoever.